You’ve just met someone really cool. Conversation is flowing, you’re laughing, you’ve broken the touch barrier, and you’re having an overall wonderful time. You both go home and text each other about how much fun you had. You talk on the phone the next day. And then again in the evening that same day. And then again the next day. 3 times the following the day. Each time, it’s them initiating the call. You’ve gone from talking about their travel plans to them unpacking deep, complicated childhood trauma. It’s been less than a week since you met.
My healthiest and most consistent friendships have been the ones that developed in time, that allowed intimacy and closeness to grow through the seasons vs. The friendships where I’ve felt ‘intense chemistry’ where we both opened up immediately and fostered closeness in a short amount of time where I wasn’t able to slow down to see the warning signs of codependent behaviours and incompatible values.
I still love getting excited about people but I’m much better at appreciating that being strangers can also be beautiful 🫶🏾❤️ I loved reading this article!
I’m still trying to decide if something I’m in now is a love bomb situation or just moving fast. we met in Barcelona and traveling across country together for a few days so it was instantly intense. Now he wants to visit me in New York. Who knows!
That's interesting that you said that about your last FWB. For me, even moving that quickly is difficult and I'm quite liberal and free thinking with that kind of thing. My current FWB and I actually talked for a few months and then we took some time apart and came back more honest and authentic with each other a few months later and we still hadn't gotten further than just kissing and sharing time with each other. My last relationship of over 4 years was one that started when the guy I was dating introduced me to his friends as his girlfirend before we even talked about it. And we never talked about it after. We just fell into a relationship and I guess that explains why that relationship lacked so much communication and it was so easy for him to attach himself to someone else after we brokeup. I think I just need all my interactions to be this authentic, even my casual ones. We gotta be honest and make sure we're on the same page.
My healthiest and most consistent friendships have been the ones that developed in time, that allowed intimacy and closeness to grow through the seasons vs. The friendships where I’ve felt ‘intense chemistry’ where we both opened up immediately and fostered closeness in a short amount of time where I wasn’t able to slow down to see the warning signs of codependent behaviours and incompatible values.
I still love getting excited about people but I’m much better at appreciating that being strangers can also be beautiful 🫶🏾❤️ I loved reading this article!
I’m still trying to decide if something I’m in now is a love bomb situation or just moving fast. we met in Barcelona and traveling across country together for a few days so it was instantly intense. Now he wants to visit me in New York. Who knows!
That's interesting that you said that about your last FWB. For me, even moving that quickly is difficult and I'm quite liberal and free thinking with that kind of thing. My current FWB and I actually talked for a few months and then we took some time apart and came back more honest and authentic with each other a few months later and we still hadn't gotten further than just kissing and sharing time with each other. My last relationship of over 4 years was one that started when the guy I was dating introduced me to his friends as his girlfirend before we even talked about it. And we never talked about it after. We just fell into a relationship and I guess that explains why that relationship lacked so much communication and it was so easy for him to attach himself to someone else after we brokeup. I think I just need all my interactions to be this authentic, even my casual ones. We gotta be honest and make sure we're on the same page.